Note: More to Life with Faith and Lois is designed to be heard, not read. We hope you’ll listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that won’t be on this page. Our transcripts are generated with speech recognition software and may contain errors. 

 

Lois 

Welcome to the podcast More to Life with Faith and Lois.

 

Faith 

I’m Faith.

 

Lois 

And I’m Lois.

 

Faith 

Our podcast explores the things you face in life that inspire and daunt you.

 

Lois 

Well, hello, Faith, so glad to be with you.

 

Faith 

I’m always glad to be with you, Lois.

 

Lois 

It’s a wonderful space that we get to share together. I love this new phase of generosity that we’re exploring for the month of February. And we began with a check of how it changes up our relationships and what a joy to discover that people are ready to receive kindness, Faith.

 

Faith 

I know …surprising, right?

 

Lois 

Especially when no strings are attached.

 

Faith 

I know I know. And I mean, it’s such a powerful thing. When there’s so much people who are unkind when you offer kindness and generosity, it people are like a sponge. They absorb it.

 

Lois 

And then I found that there was more responding in kind from either those people with whom I interacted or others. It’s a complete win, by the way to help be generous in your relationships. So if you missed that podcast, or any of the other ones that we have there on our website www.moretolifewithfaithandlois.com. And we also have a weekly newsletter, we’d love it if you signed up on our website, and we will send you our podcast every single Tuesday. So we’re continuing with our theme of being generous. And today we dive into Episode 111: What happens to your body when you’re generous?

 

Faith 

Ah, well, for me, it gets happy. It’s like you finally noticed you’re listening and take better care of me or make it feel better get more rest. I mean, those are the kind of things it goes back to that scan that we oftentimes talk about is doing the scan over a bodies of what does it need? What is it wanting? What is missing and how can perform better. And when we truly listen, that is being generous when we are able to respond in kind to our bodies and say I will give it to you, instead of pressing it and pushing it to go beyond its limits.

 

Lois 

My body starts opening up, the more there’s generosity in there. I talked last week about you know, not wanting to hold myself together. And that’s where I wanted to be generous to be, you know, offering more, but I find my body then responds by relaxing, there’s more space, because the tension we carry around when we don’t want to be generous is really extreme. And we notice it. I notice it for myself, when I’m being generous because my stomach isn’t doing fluttering things. It’s just, you know, I’m open. And it’s really weird about this space that I get. I mean, my headaches get reduced my stomach issues you know, when you eat something, it’s so funny, when you are being generous because because you’re not holding stuff in and so tight. I feel better just by doing that. And, and it seems weird. But as we’re going to explore today, there’s a lot of research that shows, oh, this makes a lot of sense. It isn’t just that being kind makes you feel better. There’s science behind it. And really, you will feel better in almost every area of your life when you are generous like this. That’s so true. Yeah. So when you decide to go beyond what’s expected of you, you’re being generous and from www.greatergood.BerkeleyEdu.com, www.forbes.com and www.everydayhealth.com, we are really grateful for all the work they’ve put together. And we’re using that today in our podcast and also the work of Dr. Chloe Carmichael. And she’s done amazing research and found some pretty amazing benefits from being generous that are linked to our physical and emotional health. So we may tell you, you’re going to feel better but there is research behind it as well.

 

Faith 

So let’s dig into it. Yes. The lowering your blood pressure is a big one. And my husband has lowered his blood pressure through meditation through getting quiet, and he doesn’t take any medication. And he is dropped it into a level that is just a little bit below normal, but it’s good for him. And it works beautifully. And he’s been doing it for years. And so he in addition is teaching his clients how to do this and his clients blood pressure is dropping. So it’s taking notice that’s the first thing and then to be able to say I will give it to you and to take the time, there’s a time investment, to say I want to do this in a good and healthy way.

 

Lois 

Boy, that is a powerful, powerful way to reduce your blood pressure. Because when you’re being generous to in addition to meditation, like say say you volunteer, a lot of people are generous in the time that they give. And when you volunteer there are actual studies that are out there from the Journal of psychology and aging that is found that you can Reduce high blood pressure or hypertension by up to 40%. That’s incredible by just volunteering. Because when you’re in this space of volunteering, think about it. You let go of that tightness, your anger level, you see people who need something you’re responding. It’s hard to be uptight, when you’re in the process of doing that. And that’s why this call to generosity is so powerful. And it doesn’t just impact our relationships, but it impacts our physical self, and how we feel about ourselves. And as we continue with social connections, it really does promote well being and healthy aging as well. I mean, think about your strong relationships, when you’re generous in them, and what they do for your mindset as you take steps every single day.

 

Faith 

So if you’re generous with someone else, or generous towards yourself, your body will bless you for it.

 

Lois 

That’s really cool.

 

Faith 

And then another one is improved outlook, empathy and intimacy. And wow, this is such a powerful powerful one. Because when you really can engage with somebody with empathy and connection and care, and concern and patience, because it’s not the fix of thing, as we’ve talked about before, this is about being with someone that is one of the most generous gifts that you can give, but it does come back on you and your body. Because you become more quiet, you become more still, you become more focused, as you’re helping the other person come to that place as well.

 

Lois 

We move from just our perspective to someone else’s perspective. And it’s really interesting how that can free us up. Yeah, because as you just said, if we’re not trying to fix someone, if we’re allowing things to sit where they are, and we’re participating in a conversation or an activity, just because with no outcome demanded, then we’re seeing something from somebody else’s viewpoint and That helps reduce the tension that we have inside of us. So physically, we have this improved outlook. And we we can be more intimate when you think of your romantic partner and how you relate to him or her. And what that changes inside of you. When you’re being generous. It doesn’t just affect him or her, it affects you as well. Because you loosen up you feel more confident, you feel able to share anything. And it’s it’s one of those beautiful things because our outlook, which we talked about last week can actually be improved with generosity. And that is your body and it makes a difference in every single thing you do.

 

Faith 

Oh it so does it so does, and meditation energizes you and just a little bit of a guide here. A guideposts to present to our listeners is the fact that meditation doesn’t mean you’re just sitting there quietly with your eyes closed. Find the unique way that brings That meditative place for you. For some, it might be a walking meditation, it might be a reflective one, it might be listening to music that brings you into that place of quiet and stillness and reflection. Because when you get to that place of where you’re reflecting about your life, or life itself or the lives of others, there is a generosity of truth that begins to rise up inside of insight and understanding. And that’s what we carry into the rest of our day into the art world. And it generates generosity, it creates more, it’s just kind of like the, the engine that gets generosity going. Because we see things as you said a few moments ago, from a different perspective.

 

Lois 

Well, and I love what you said earlier about your husband, and what it’s done to his blood pressure. Because when you get into this contemplative way of life, and it matters not what you want to Call this but the idea of bringing yourself to a place of calm and peace however you get there, you are going to improve a couple of things that will change your body like your sleep improves and your quality of life and your physical health and your psychological health. So these are all ways that your body improves with you being generous to yourself with taking these moments. And there are plenty of people who practice meditation who never close their eyes. Their whole idea is to take in what the surroundings are and let them in, let that surrounding inform what they’re thinking and just be free. Be quiet, be still and appreciate either nature or music. The idea is to not commune that’s that that’s the key right is to have some silence. And we’ve learned both faith and I because we even did a whole podcast on silence. What silence brings to even a relationship and here think about what it brings to yourself. It just takes things down. There are times where I want to listen to the radio, listen to podcast. And do all of that when I’m in the car. And there are other moments where I need just a break. It doesn’t mean I’m meditating, folks, I’m still driving, but there’s silence going on. And that brings me to a place of calm, which allows me then to have energy for the next thing I’m going to be doing that day.

 

Faith 

One of my most favorite things to do is to when there’s a snowfall, and that’s the big flakes, it absorbs sound, each flake absorbs sound. And that’s why it’s so quiet when you are in the snow. And you’re walking in. It’s snowing outside, and you’re walking. Oh, wow, it’s so quiet. And if you will just be still and just stand there. It’s a silence that just envelops you. And there’s a piece that comes with that and it does something to your entire body completely.

 

Lois 

And that’s you being generous to yourself. And the thing we were really sharing today, as we talk about what happens to your body when you’re generous is that these are gifts you give to yourself. And so when you use that silence with the snowfall, or if you are privileged enough to go on a vacation near a beach like I was recently, oh my goodness, the water and what that does, it’s the rhythm of that and being silent with it and just taking it in or swimming out and with snorkel looking down into fish that are swimming and realizing, wow, there’s a whole other life down here. I don’t have to communicate, I don’t have to say anything. I just have to observe and take it all in. And that gives you energy by the way to be more generous. The reason we recharge and take breaks and meditate is so that you can come back, re-energized, refreshed and ready to face and we’re looking at 2020 with wonderful eyes.

 

Faith 

So good. And then giving is contagious. If you give something away, then you want to see that happened and and the best example of that is being in a Starbucks line and you pay for The person behind you, and how many times that person will say I want to do that too, because they felt so gifted in that moment. And it was such a generous offering for them. So they want to give it away and they do it again, it is contagious, or the right Christmas time and some of the stores where somebody will pay everything off for somebody, somebody else wants to do that, too. So it is contagious. It’s a powerful, powerful gift that is freely given. And you have the opportunity of being able to give it away as well.

 

Lois 

And that is that starts affecting your body because it makes you even happier than you were just five minutes before. You know there’s actually this physical release of oxytocin when you give. And that actually gives you this feeling of warmth and euphoria and connection to other and when you have that release, you realize, wow, this feels really good to do this. And so you think Keep you keep it going. There’s a cycle and you watch people, like you just said, whether they’re in line or anyplace else, or even just in receiving a card. What’s the likelihood that someone who receives a card from you that you’ve expressed gratitude for a relationship will then do that for someone else? And so we keep this cycle going, and what a great cycle instead of as you point to a negative cycle, because sometimes with negativity, we then can spiral into, you know, sinking into a problem versus generosity seems to lift us up. And with the oxytocin and everything else we’ve got going on. It puts us into a different arena.

 

Faith 

That’s really true. And then loving yourself. And this is something I’m doing like right now because we’re after the holidays. And I’ve noticed like going up and down the stairs that’s like, okay, I don’t feel it’s good. And it’s because of everything that has been gifted to us in lots of candies and lots of fun things. And it’s like, okay, it’s got it. change because if I keep doing this, then my body is telling me, I don’t like this anymore. It’s one thing I’m maxed. So let’s change it. Let’s go back to what it needs. And as I’ve started this, it is starting to feel better. That’s loving your body. That’s saying it’s important. I’m important. And to love yourself means you’re listening to what your body is telling you.

 

Lois 

Isn’t that funny that we also need to listen to ourselves and not just listen to others. We talk about generosity as being an active listener with in relationships, but we need to be active listeners of our own bodies of things that that don’t feel good when we do that, and we need to then stop doesn’t feel good stop. really can’t but it tastes so good. I know but we need to stop right there. And the other flip side or part part of this not flip side. The other part of loving yourself is is knowing that it there’s no there’s no other into it. Like when you meet really happy people, they’re not sitting there going, oh boy, if I’m if I’m generous today, I’m going to have nothing left. Because we’re not talking about financial gifts and big huge gifts. We’re talking about this attitude of kindness and compassion. So you’re well doesn’t have to run dry, you can keep giving and not worry that you’re going to run out. And we’ve had a podcast on scarcity where if you’re afraid that you’re going to run out of things, you’ll actually sit there sit on something, and I can’t move on this. The idea here being if you want to watch your body, respond to generosity, keep being gracious, keep being compassionate, and watch how you’ll get filled up. By doing those things. It’s kind of like it comes back. It’s this. It’s this spring that keeps overflowing in your body.

 

Faith 

Give it away. Give it away.

 

Lois 

And maybe we can ask a question of you today as you’re listening. What will you do today? To be generous to yourself?

 

Faith 

Um, that’s a really good question and and really take some time and contemplate that because there’s a lot of ways that you can get to the answer and you start with what do I need? What would feel good? What would be helpful for me, and to ask those questions of yourself as a way to explore more about your body, and who you are, and what you’re wanting and what you’re needing and how you could feel better.

 

Lois 

And you will feel better, we can actually promise you that, the more generous you are. And don’t just take that from us. But from all of these really smart people we cited for you earlier in the podcast.

 

Faith 

Make an appointment with yourself to be generous, where you need it most physically, emotionally, spiritually, and do it.

 

Lois 

Start small and observe how your body responds to just one act of kindness, and then maybe add one more thing and track what occurs to you and those around you.

 

Faith 

Please share this podcast with a friend.

 

Lois 

And join us next week. As we wonder how to generosity influence your spirituality.

 

Faith 

Sign up for our weekly newsletter on our website and subscribe to our podcast wherever you listen.

 

Lois 

No matter what you face in relationships, your body, spirituality or your craft.

 

Faith 

We are here to assure you, there is always more to life.

 

Lois 

We’ll be back next week.